Okay I know I am becoming a stereotype even as I write this, but I need help. Here it goes:
So about a month ago we decided to be done with diapers for good with Owen. I was not going to be that mom who took baby steps to get this crap (pun intended) over with. I was going to bite the bullet, and take the plunge. I knew it was gonna suck, but I would rather be covered in poop for a few days, maybe even a week or so, and be done with it. Well that was Monday September 29th. Four and a half weeks, and endless times being covered in feces later, and I am done, I give up.
Here is what we have been doing.... I will tell you and my hope is that someone who reads this will be able to tell me what it is that I am doing wrong.
-1st thing in the AM we take him potty, usually 80% of the time his diaper he slept in is dry. He is still in diapers during his one nap, and while asleep at night. I have been told by everyone, that Pull Ups are glorified, more expensive diapers, so we are just using diapers.
- I started with setting a timer and taking him potty every 20 minutes, if he went pee he got one potty treat, poop two. Eventually I figured he really only needed to go every 45mins to an hour. That was working out pretty well. I then started to notice "the signs" that he needed to go. Every time he wandered off down the hallway I would find an accident. So I got pretty good at watching him, and taking him at the right times. That is it, That is what I have been doing for a month, and we are not moving on. He is not potty trained, I am. If I try to get anything done, including feeding the baby, shower, use the bathroom myself, ANYTHING. He will create a mess for me to clean up.
So my question is this: How do I get him to care about it? Is this normal? Have I, by deciding to potty train my child, agreed to never let him out of my sight again? I am seriously contemplating putting him back in diapers until he starts to care about his own bowels. Would it really be so bad to just put him back in diapers? Will I be making things worse? My favorite time of day is when he is asleep :( I am on edge all day that he is in big boy pants. I have done the let him play outside thing too, he comes in with muddy urine all over him.
I am done. I will accept any and all suggestions. THANKS for reading, hope you're not dry heaving you non-breaders out there.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Yep, this is me, I am THAT Blogger
Posted by Allison at 3:04 PM
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13 comments:
I say--he's not ready. Put him back in diapers. Lucas was basically self-potty trained at the end of the summer, and my mom said "if you don't do this now, it will pass." And we were packing, and then moving, and I didn't. And it did. And he wouldn't go for like 2 months on the toilet, but would tell me a millisecond after he did it. He starting to tell me again, multiple times a day. Take a break. (That's my oh so wise inexperienced mom advice.) He'll get it when he's ready. ?
I have never had a child but we did take Tanzy to doggy-training a few years ago. The guy there said that you need to have instant feedback for mistakes so that the dog knows what he or she did wrong. He recommended using a spray bottle. If we saw Tanzy squatting down then we squirted her.
Owen is a bit bigger than Tanzy so maybe you will need a kiddie-sized super-soaker. Good solutions usually solve more than one problem--like this one! You will help Owen get trained plus you get the relieve the pent up stress that has accumulated over the last month.
I need to amend my comment:
"I have never had a child..." should have read:
"I have never had a child that went through potty training."
Whew, glad I caught that before Sam did.
When you figure this out. Let me know. I don't ever want to try potty training again. Worst experience ever!
I'm planning on having my Mom do it when she is in town. That's the only way I see it happening.
Love,
The Coward.
I never knew that I married a quiter. We both know that if I were a stay at home dad, like I originally invisioned, Owen would already be potty trained.
I say cowboy up and full speed ahead on the potty training.
Do not underestimate the power of negative reinforcement.
If there is a poo you put he face near it and yell "NO!", then spank or whatever your emotions dictate.
Maybe he needs a doll that is potty training. Those who can't do, teach. Then they do.
I say he is not ready either. Just quit. put him in diapers till he is ready! Jake did not do it till a couple months after three, and it was 1/2 a day and done. Dont stress!!!
oh, yes--i remember this well. i totally pushed katie right after she was two because i was friends with amy dalley who had mitch trained at 20 months. i felt like i was the last mom out there who hadn't done it. i pushed and pushed and freaked out and pushed more. then gave up and she did it about 9 months later, but it's still always gonna be a process.
i think potty training is hands-down the hardest thing about parenting a child under the age of 14.
mia just potty trained in may after she turned 3. how old is owen now?
Nina will be going to high school in a diaper, and I don't care. I have a friend with 5 kids. Her first potty-trained herself at 18 months and her second wasn't potty-trained until she was 8 years old. The rest were all trained by the time they were 2 or 3. The moral of the story. Every kid is different. Let your kid lead. (and if it's the 8 year old, get medical intervention)
Thanks to everyone who gave me advice. As you can tell by my re entry into the blogosphere, I have put Owen back in diapers. It has been 2 days now and I am doing much better. He did say to Spencer yesterday that he didn't want to wear "Eli Diapers" I am taking that as progress. What ever helps make me feel better about neglecting my kids and blogging! Right?
Anna, there has to be more to this 8 year old!?! You scared me with that one, is she too wheel chair bound? Yeah I would hope we would be getting some medical help if Owen gets to that point, see you tomorrow.
Take a break, relax and don't worry... he will eventually want something to do with the potty! (thats what everyone keeps telling me) Its such a challenging and frustrating task! I have been reading to Easton why he sits on the toilet. It seems to help him feel more comfortable but he still asks me to put a diaper on so he can go hide in a corner and poop! I need advice and help too
OkaY, just found your blog from word to your mother, and love it! You are darling as are your boys!
I was able to potty train my boys in a week or less. I am a working mom, so when it was time (bout 2 1/2) I took the week off and put nothing on the calendar. We started day one, completely naked (the boy that is), it made them complete aware of themselves and no protection to "slip up". After a day, maybe a day and a half of that, we added big boy pants (no clothes), gradually added some pants, etc. But we didn't go anywhere, just stayed home. If there was a slip, we took it back a step until they mastered that one. Within a week, we were good to go.
Of course, by the time you read this, Owen is probably already done and a big boy all on his own. Just thought I'd pass on our little bit of success. Don't ask about what happened when they became teenagers, that is a whole different story!
Love your blog, you're going on my reader!
OkaY, just found your blog from word to your mother, and love it! You are darling as are your boys!
I was able to potty train my boys in a week or less. I am a working mom, so when it was time (bout 2 1/2) I took the week off and put nothing on the calendar. We started day one, completely naked (the boy that is), it made them complete aware of themselves and no protection to "slip up". After a day, maybe a day and a half of that, we added big boy pants (no clothes), gradually added some pants, etc. But we didn't go anywhere, just stayed home. If there was a slip, we took it back a step until they mastered that one. Within a week, we were good to go.
Of course, by the time you read this, Owen is probably already done and a big boy all on his own. Just thought I'd pass on our little bit of success. Don't ask about what happened when they became teenagers, that is a whole different story!
Love your blog, you're going on my reader!
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